Wars of conquest are always supported by the civilian populace, even though they're started by the leaders. It's the civilians that support the war logistically, morally (in the sense of "moral support", not morality), through voting (in democracies), etc, etc, et cetera. The civilians in Dresden may not have fired a shot themselves, but they certainly supported the war effort every bit as much as the civilians who built the bombers that burned Dresden to the ground.
In the end, the destruction of Germany was a direct and just punishment for the election of Hitler and the Nazi party, and the subsequent material support of the war.
Same with Japan.
Don't want to get all your shit burnt to the ground along with your family and friends?
Don't start shit.
It's pretty simple.